The Story Only You Can Write

By Tonya Twitchell

In the past two issues of Las Vegas Woman magazine, I have invited you to consider the stories you tell—and have told—about who you are and about who you can be. I have encouraged you to consider where each story came from and to evaluate the degree to which each story serves and champions you in and across your life. I have also invited you to notice and pay attention to the armor and masks you may, at times, be wearing. To consider whether these masks are useful and appropriate and begin to set aside the armor and thinking that no longer serve you in your life.

Today, I invite you to fast forward to the day of your inevitable passing and think about the legacy that you want to create. What are the specific words that you want the people in your life to use to describe who you are and how you lived? Why are these words important and how does the absence of these words either affirm or diminish your overall satisfaction with your life?

Imagine that today is the day of your passing. Imagine that your legacy is the one you have been creating thus far. How do you feel about this legacy? Is it one of design or default? As you think about the differences between the two, what are the things that you must do to design differently? What limiting beliefs, stories, and habits are slowing you down and standing in your way? What are the actions and activities that you can begin to do in a more focused and intentional fashion?

Begin to view your life through the lens of your intended legacy. Decide that you can and will design your legacy and that you will no longer settle for a legacy of default. Champion yourself and your heart’s truest desires. Be willing to be honest and brave with yourself about where and when you are currently on target, and where and why you may be falling short.

Give yourself the same grace, compassion, and forgiveness that you would give to your children or best friend. Allow yourself to set aside judgements, beat-ups and blame. Set down the masks or armor that are heavy and no longer relevant. Allow yourself to connect with the power and clarity of your legacy and life’s purpose. Surround yourself with people who will stand with you and, when all else fails, be willing to simply get up, dust yourself off, and start again.

Tonya Twitchell is a champion of people and possibilities. In her work with individuals, teams, and corporations, Tonya provides training, coaching, and public speaking about the importance and intersection of leadership and legacy. For more information, visit,, or email Tonya @